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Sunday, January 9, 2011

Nervous and Anxious

So, I have to go see a neurologist tomorrow and a cardiologist Wednesday. I am getting kinda nervous and anxious at the same time. I have been having panic attacks, migranes, back pain and rapid heart rate episodes for going on 8 months now and nobody can tell me what is wrong with me. I have had over 10 EKG's done, many blood tests, many urine test, chest x-rays. Been misdiagnosed with athsma, which turns out I dont have and I am glad about that. Finally found a doctor who is taking the time to figure this out instead of atomatically lableing me with panic disorder and medicating me, which only made me sicker. I am nervous about what I might find out, but at the same time that maybe, just maybe I will get answers to what has been plaguing me for all this time. I want answers and to get back to being normal again, I am just praying to God that it is something not too serious. At the same time I am scared that they will find nothing wrong with me and I will be back at square one again. I think living with the idea that I dont know what is going on with my body is worse than finding out I have something bad. Anyways, I hope I am atleast going in the right direction and that there will be a light at the end of the tunnel soon. It is very difficult to live my daily life like this, but somehow I make it through and will continue to do so, till I no longer can.

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